Date: Wed, 17 Jul 2002 17:30:25
Subject: Is there a difference between AVOIDANCE and DENIAL?
From: ernestonotcom@netzero.com
To: berto_alto@tank20.com

So BERTO,

you remember when we used to sit on grandma's PORCH SWING and drink LEMONADE and talk about CARS and GIRLS?

those were the GOOD TIMES, before grandma KICKEDTHEBUCKET.

now I can't even stand talking about CARS, but I do it ALL FUCKING DAY LONG.

and GIRLS? My marriage is a MIRAGE. But here's the kicker, Berottttttttttt. I haven't said a WORD to DARLENE aobut the factt hat ISAWHER naked with anohter man on our FUCKING ANNIVERSARY.

WHY?

BEcause I;m DEATHly afraid of what she'll say if I confronther onit.

She COULD WALK OUT, and take the kids with her. oh I don't know, maybe the JUDGE or WHATEVER would say well ernesto you get CUSTODY since your wife is FUCKING THE FRY COOK but that's not even it berto the kick is this.

I LOVE FOUR PEOPLE on the whole fucking planet. That's you jeffie jessie and DARLENE. I lose darleneand what the hell have I got left. she'snot just the MOTHER OF MY CHILDREN, she's also the woman that I love, even now, maybe more now.

so I guess there's a few courses of action available to me, I mean I could BRAIN THE GREASEBALL WHO WAS BONING MY WIFE, I could GET IN A CAR AND DRIVE UNTIL I FORGET WHO I AM, I could ask darlene if she wants to go in COUNSELING, I guess we could just GETADIVORCE, or I could PRETEND THE WHOLE THING JUST NSNT HAPPENING.

Which is the route I've taken sofar. I SPENT LIKE FIFTY BUCKS in one dollar bills at a STRIP JOINT after work last night and I DIDN;T EVEN GET A HARDON. I don't want a new girl, not even for a CHEAP BLOWJOB IN THE ALLEY, I just want the one Ive "GOT."

So anyway sorry to be dumping all this on you. ME AND THE KIDS ARE EXCITED about coming to SEE YOU SOON and the docs say they can release you IN MY CUSTODY. I know you'll p robably be ALL FUCKED UP, but that's okay the kids probably won't even notice. You in a DELUSIONAL, MEDICATED state will be no weirder than the freaks they see every day in our SO-CAL TRAILER PARK, no weirder than their FUCKED UP MOM AND DAD.

LIVEANDLEARN

Love,

Ernesto