Yes! Your stapler is a perfect choice - it's sturdy, but small enough to be precise. You snatch it from your desk, put the cylinder on your bedside table, and smash the butt of the stapler into the red object. Surprisingly, the material is not as thick or difficult as you expected, instead it cracks apart quietly, carries in the air around the table and to the floor beneath. Perplexed by its fragility, you decide that you can't keep these pieces near you. You grab the nearest container - a tupperware container that held last week's work lunch - and you gather the red flakes and shove them inside. You shut the container as you run down the stairs. You fling open your front door, start to make your way toward your bike until you are stopped short by a hulking form standing in your way - it's your friend, Wallace. "Whoa, why are you in such a hurry?" Annoyed and impatient, you don't want to explain everything to Wallace; you're not even sure how you would. Luckily, Wallace is the sort of weird and loyal guy who will take you at your word. You make a flash decision. "I really need a favor, Wallace. I have to get rid of this container. I mean, I just can't have it near me anymore. Will you take it for me?" You shove the tupperware container in his direction and close your eyes against the sun blaring at you from over his shoulder. "Sure," he says, "No problem. Call me later, though, we need to set up our next game night." You feel the container leave your hand, and you open your eyes to see Wallace trotting back to his car. He turns around, jogs back to you with his hand extended. "I forgot - I got a new phone, new number. The new number's on my card." You take the card and go back inside, glad for the relief from the sun - it feels like your eyeballs are burning. Once inside, you already feel the relief of the object's absence, but you still need to seriously chill out. You know just the ticket - cryptograms, your favorite pasttime. You grab a nearby newspaper, turn to the puzzles page, and get to work. You're having a great time, even start to relax, until you start to realize the puzzle's solution. What in the world is going on here??